The best rank one Gladiator blog I have ever seen.
note: This is not my writing, but those of Marvelleous Gladiator Marxo.
This is the one of, if not the best, pieces I have seen on the blog " World of Ming ".
Please enjoy!!
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Marvelous Gladiator Marxo
Some people may be wondering: "Who is Marxo?" These people are shameful, and I refuse to cater to such uninformed dimwits. The management insists that I formulate some sort of introduction, so here you are:
In an attempt to save time, I'll just throw it out there: I am unquestionably the best DK to grace the Arenaverse. The scientific method has been applied to this theory, and I'd be more than happy to provide you with my research. While I've yet to break into the pro scene, my accomplishments are extraordinary nonetheless, and emphatically warrant my prodigious ego. Some of you might know me as the world-record holder for the best win-ratio in the history of arena: an unprecedented 96% at 2860 with Merciless Gladiator Velsus.
It should come as no surprise that I've spent the majority of my illustrious WoW career on BG#1: The Reckoning, as it has established itself as the brewery of the best players in the US, including Cuddlybunny(the Neilyo of WotLK), Kollektiv, Uckington, Serennia, Vorrent, Sallice, Shinaniganz, Ohnoes, Xeckz, Shouri, Zizek, and Pookz, just to name a few.
Sure, I may not have the name-recognition of a Pookz or an Azael, but what I lack in e-fame, I make up for in actually being literate. You can expect my blogs to be articulate, poignant, thought-provoking, and possibly even life-changing; this is not the vapid tripe you've become accustomed to. As a student of philosophy, you can expect me to apply my ivy league education to my blog: Is Serennia stuck in Kierkegaard's aesthetic stage of life? What does the SK-100 teach us about sheep mentality? Would Simone de Beauvoir consider Hafu a feminist? These are important questions that deserve to be explored.
Think of this as "the thinking man's WoM" - a little medicine in your ice cream. If Yog is the Stephenie Meyer of WoM, I'm the Dostoevsky. If you find yourself not enjoying my blogs, they're probably just too deep for you, you philistine garbage can.
Overcoming the Duelist: A Practical Guide
Tired of being a Duelist, in game and in real life? Well, you're in luck! Your friendly neighborhood Gladiator is here with part one in an on-going series of practical guides that should answer all of your pizza-face questions.
I know you have many questions on how to improve your Duelist-level performance in arena, school, your social life, and at the work place. I'll cover some of the more common questions here, but feel free to post further inquiries in the comment section. My pro-gaming expertise will allow me to answer all Gladiator-related questions accurately and eloquently. Take advantage of this unique opportunity, as it's rare that a true Gladiator would even acknowledge your existence. I have benefited greatly by your terrible play over the years, consistently making me look that much greater in contrast; now it's time for me to give back.
The first step to shedding your Duelist title is to admit that you're not good.
Secondly, stop PvEing completely. Scientific Proof Magazine has stated that the Duelist-friendly environment of "hardcore raiding" lowers your reaction time significantly, and cuts your Actions Per Minute in half. Don't believe it? Just ask former Gladiator Shakyra. In season 5, I was able to carry him to rank 1 in the 5v5 bracket with relative ease, but ever since he began raiding with Deus Vox, he has yet to reach his former Gladiator potential, and can barely tie his own shoes anymore - this is not a coincidence.
Thirdly, eat right, you out-of-shape, sixpack-less nerd. Junk food cannot sustain the brain and body of a Gladiator. If you don't have the self control to resist the wily charms of fast food, candy, and Mountain Dew, you don't have what it takes for pro gaming. I personally live off a strict diet of wild salmon, unprocessed cacao bean, green tea, and acai berries.
Fourth, leave your Duelist friends behind. The majority of Duelists are hopeless, and will only weigh you down. The road to Gladiator has no traction - you've gotta step on a few necks if you want that title. Besides, you won't need friends where you're going. As a Gladiator, I am always in the presence of a Gladiator and thus, am always in good company. A Gladiator is never bored.
Always remember: Gladiator is more than a title - it's a mentality. It's crucial that you keep your incredible Gladiator mind stimulated. For this, I recommend the individualist writings of 19th century German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche. His words are an inspiration to all Gladiators, and are just as relevant today as they were then:
"I teach you the Gladiator. The Duelist is something that shall be overcome. What have you done to overcome him? ... All beings so far have created something beyond themselves; and do you want to be the ebb of this great flood, and even go back to the 1800 bracket rather than overcome the Duelist? What is a Challenger to a Duelist? A laughing stock or painful embarrassment. And the Duelist shall be that to the Gladiator: a laughingstock or painful embarrassment. You have made your way from terrible PvE scum to Duelist, and much in you is still garbage. Once you were Challengers, and even now, too, the Duelist is more Challenger than any Challenger.... The Gladiator is the meaning of the arenaverse. Let your will say: the Gladiator shall be the meaning of the arenaverse.... The Duelist is a rope, tied between weak geeks and the Gladiator—a rope over the Ragefire Chasm ... what is great in the Duelist is that he is a bridge and not an end."
-Existential Gladiator Nietzsche
The Cancer That's Killing WoW as an E-Sport
Anyone who had the displeasure of viewing ESL Edmonton and MLG Orlando in their entirety would surely agree: the current WoW tournament scene is a tiresome cesspit. Nearly everyone projected Complexity Black as dominating the "competition" in both of these events, and that's precisely what happened. Nobody enjoys watching Complexity Black steamroll team after team with their beast-cleave composition, but whereas most blame their "overpowered" comp for these deadening matches, I shift the blame elsewhere:
It is my contention that Flex, Twixz and Toez are the only team in the current tournament scene that isn't a complete waste of a tournament spot.These other tournament regulars have proven, time after time, that they're strategically inept and utterly incapable of adapting.
How many times does the PHD/Beast Cleave have to disembowel your RMP before you make a change? I recommend you reallocate all the time you spend brooding about how they "hard countered" you into practicing a second comp that stands a chance against, or maybe even counters, Beast Cleave. There's no excuse. Every team is allowed to run any comp that they wish. You're allowed 4 players on a roster, so it should be fairly undemanding to practice a second set-up.
I want to vomit whenever I hear one of these teams insist that they're "above playing a cheese comp" - that they should be commended for sticking with their single comp. If you show up to a tournament with only one comp up your sleeve, you're not being noble - you're just dumb and lazy. WoW has an element of Rock, Paper, Scissors, and you awful idiots simply continue to choose paper while Complexity Black just scissors their way to first place, tournament after tournament.
Let's look at the MLG 2009 Grand Finals in Orlando. The match that should have been an exciting battle between two of the best teams in the world. Instead, this is what we got: Complexity Red's brilliant plan to overcome the Beast Cleave menace was to have Sodah switch from his Priest to a Druid. A Druid.. against Beast Cleave. I know Duelists who were baffled by this terrible decision(this is an exaggeration, I don't actually allow Duelists into my perimeter). I'm sorry, but if a team that is capable of making such a massive tactical error as this is allowed to make it to the MLG Grand Final, the system is severely flawed.
Complexity Black is the best team in today's tournament scene by a large margin. Which is to say, they're the only team aware of how a tournament actually works. While their brain-dead opponents play each tournament the way they wish it was, Pragmatic Gladiators Flex, Twixz and Toez are playing the tournament the way it's meant to be played, and have been rewarded deservedly.
The tournament scene needs some fresh blood. The current teams are allowed to come to these events completely unprepared, and it's making every tournament increasingly tedious and nearly unwatchable. WoW as an e-sport cannot survive if it continues to be plagued by mediocre teams and predictable outcomes. The onus is on the players to make WoW a viable spectator e-sport, and they're not doing their jobs. To the sponsors I ask this: Please, drop your otiose team. There are plenty of unsponsored teams out there who would be willing to put in the effort, and in turn, save WoW as an e-sport
This is the one of, if not the best, pieces I have seen on the blog " World of Ming ".
Please enjoy!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Marvelous Gladiator Marxo
Some people may be wondering: "Who is Marxo?" These people are shameful, and I refuse to cater to such uninformed dimwits. The management insists that I formulate some sort of introduction, so here you are:
In an attempt to save time, I'll just throw it out there: I am unquestionably the best DK to grace the Arenaverse. The scientific method has been applied to this theory, and I'd be more than happy to provide you with my research. While I've yet to break into the pro scene, my accomplishments are extraordinary nonetheless, and emphatically warrant my prodigious ego. Some of you might know me as the world-record holder for the best win-ratio in the history of arena: an unprecedented 96% at 2860 with Merciless Gladiator Velsus.
It should come as no surprise that I've spent the majority of my illustrious WoW career on BG#1: The Reckoning, as it has established itself as the brewery of the best players in the US, including Cuddlybunny(the Neilyo of WotLK), Kollektiv, Uckington, Serennia, Vorrent, Sallice, Shinaniganz, Ohnoes, Xeckz, Shouri, Zizek, and Pookz, just to name a few.
Sure, I may not have the name-recognition of a Pookz or an Azael, but what I lack in e-fame, I make up for in actually being literate. You can expect my blogs to be articulate, poignant, thought-provoking, and possibly even life-changing; this is not the vapid tripe you've become accustomed to. As a student of philosophy, you can expect me to apply my ivy league education to my blog: Is Serennia stuck in Kierkegaard's aesthetic stage of life? What does the SK-100 teach us about sheep mentality? Would Simone de Beauvoir consider Hafu a feminist? These are important questions that deserve to be explored.
Think of this as "the thinking man's WoM" - a little medicine in your ice cream. If Yog is the Stephenie Meyer of WoM, I'm the Dostoevsky. If you find yourself not enjoying my blogs, they're probably just too deep for you, you philistine garbage can.
Overcoming the Duelist: A Practical Guide
Tired of being a Duelist, in game and in real life? Well, you're in luck! Your friendly neighborhood Gladiator is here with part one in an on-going series of practical guides that should answer all of your pizza-face questions.
I know you have many questions on how to improve your Duelist-level performance in arena, school, your social life, and at the work place. I'll cover some of the more common questions here, but feel free to post further inquiries in the comment section. My pro-gaming expertise will allow me to answer all Gladiator-related questions accurately and eloquently. Take advantage of this unique opportunity, as it's rare that a true Gladiator would even acknowledge your existence. I have benefited greatly by your terrible play over the years, consistently making me look that much greater in contrast; now it's time for me to give back.
The first step to shedding your Duelist title is to admit that you're not good.
Secondly, stop PvEing completely. Scientific Proof Magazine has stated that the Duelist-friendly environment of "hardcore raiding" lowers your reaction time significantly, and cuts your Actions Per Minute in half. Don't believe it? Just ask former Gladiator Shakyra. In season 5, I was able to carry him to rank 1 in the 5v5 bracket with relative ease, but ever since he began raiding with Deus Vox, he has yet to reach his former Gladiator potential, and can barely tie his own shoes anymore - this is not a coincidence.
Thirdly, eat right, you out-of-shape, sixpack-less nerd. Junk food cannot sustain the brain and body of a Gladiator. If you don't have the self control to resist the wily charms of fast food, candy, and Mountain Dew, you don't have what it takes for pro gaming. I personally live off a strict diet of wild salmon, unprocessed cacao bean, green tea, and acai berries.
Fourth, leave your Duelist friends behind. The majority of Duelists are hopeless, and will only weigh you down. The road to Gladiator has no traction - you've gotta step on a few necks if you want that title. Besides, you won't need friends where you're going. As a Gladiator, I am always in the presence of a Gladiator and thus, am always in good company. A Gladiator is never bored.
Always remember: Gladiator is more than a title - it's a mentality. It's crucial that you keep your incredible Gladiator mind stimulated. For this, I recommend the individualist writings of 19th century German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche. His words are an inspiration to all Gladiators, and are just as relevant today as they were then:
"I teach you the Gladiator. The Duelist is something that shall be overcome. What have you done to overcome him? ... All beings so far have created something beyond themselves; and do you want to be the ebb of this great flood, and even go back to the 1800 bracket rather than overcome the Duelist? What is a Challenger to a Duelist? A laughing stock or painful embarrassment. And the Duelist shall be that to the Gladiator: a laughingstock or painful embarrassment. You have made your way from terrible PvE scum to Duelist, and much in you is still garbage. Once you were Challengers, and even now, too, the Duelist is more Challenger than any Challenger.... The Gladiator is the meaning of the arenaverse. Let your will say: the Gladiator shall be the meaning of the arenaverse.... The Duelist is a rope, tied between weak geeks and the Gladiator—a rope over the Ragefire Chasm ... what is great in the Duelist is that he is a bridge and not an end."
-Existential Gladiator Nietzsche
The Cancer That's Killing WoW as an E-Sport
Anyone who had the displeasure of viewing ESL Edmonton and MLG Orlando in their entirety would surely agree: the current WoW tournament scene is a tiresome cesspit. Nearly everyone projected Complexity Black as dominating the "competition" in both of these events, and that's precisely what happened. Nobody enjoys watching Complexity Black steamroll team after team with their beast-cleave composition, but whereas most blame their "overpowered" comp for these deadening matches, I shift the blame elsewhere:
It is my contention that Flex, Twixz and Toez are the only team in the current tournament scene that isn't a complete waste of a tournament spot.These other tournament regulars have proven, time after time, that they're strategically inept and utterly incapable of adapting.
How many times does the PHD/Beast Cleave have to disembowel your RMP before you make a change? I recommend you reallocate all the time you spend brooding about how they "hard countered" you into practicing a second comp that stands a chance against, or maybe even counters, Beast Cleave. There's no excuse. Every team is allowed to run any comp that they wish. You're allowed 4 players on a roster, so it should be fairly undemanding to practice a second set-up.
I want to vomit whenever I hear one of these teams insist that they're "above playing a cheese comp" - that they should be commended for sticking with their single comp. If you show up to a tournament with only one comp up your sleeve, you're not being noble - you're just dumb and lazy. WoW has an element of Rock, Paper, Scissors, and you awful idiots simply continue to choose paper while Complexity Black just scissors their way to first place, tournament after tournament.
Let's look at the MLG 2009 Grand Finals in Orlando. The match that should have been an exciting battle between two of the best teams in the world. Instead, this is what we got: Complexity Red's brilliant plan to overcome the Beast Cleave menace was to have Sodah switch from his Priest to a Druid. A Druid.. against Beast Cleave. I know Duelists who were baffled by this terrible decision(this is an exaggeration, I don't actually allow Duelists into my perimeter). I'm sorry, but if a team that is capable of making such a massive tactical error as this is allowed to make it to the MLG Grand Final, the system is severely flawed.
Complexity Black is the best team in today's tournament scene by a large margin. Which is to say, they're the only team aware of how a tournament actually works. While their brain-dead opponents play each tournament the way they wish it was, Pragmatic Gladiators Flex, Twixz and Toez are playing the tournament the way it's meant to be played, and have been rewarded deservedly.
The tournament scene needs some fresh blood. The current teams are allowed to come to these events completely unprepared, and it's making every tournament increasingly tedious and nearly unwatchable. WoW as an e-sport cannot survive if it continues to be plagued by mediocre teams and predictable outcomes. The onus is on the players to make WoW a viable spectator e-sport, and they're not doing their jobs. To the sponsors I ask this: Please, drop your otiose team. There are plenty of unsponsored teams out there who would be willing to put in the effort, and in turn, save WoW as an e-sport